Waiting...

As I waited patiently for my phone to ring with my pathology reports, I decided to read. I'm not much of a reader. I was a teacher, so I read children books or educational books and that was it.

The day after I was diagnosed with Malignant Melanoma, I came across a website called Pale Girl Speaks. It was about a Hollywood actress' journey with Melanoma. She wrote a book about her experience. I ordered it and with my fantastic prime shipping with Amazon, I had it the next day. I read it in one day. I shocked myself reading it so fast, but I just couldn't put it down. I wanted to be informed. I also wanted to feel that I was apart of this cool new club-you know the Cancer Hating Club. I wanted to feel as if I am not alone.


A week has gone by now since my last biopsy and I was starting to worry. So, I called the office myself. The receptionist was kind enough to remind me that "as soon as they get the results, they will call you". Yep, I knew that, but it was Friday and I really didn't want to WAIT two more days...

I hung up the phone and tried to distract myself by shopping online. Which, is a problem for me, especially Amazon. I just love that I can have something here, at my doorstep, in two days or less. It impresses me. Really. How do they get it here so fast?

While shopping for SPF/UPF clothing (yes, they make clothes that protect you from the sun), my phone rang. I jumped out of my chair and ran to the phone. I saw my doctor's number on the caller I.D. My heart immediately started beating out of my chest.

Through conversation, I learned that my mole was Atypical Pre-Cancerous. The nurse was nice to tell me that it was common with melanoma patients and that her husband had lots of them.

Which leads me to something that I've been meaning to share. Something that I want you to think about....

When you have Cancer, many people want to tell you THEIR story. Stories about their Grandma, Grandpa, Mom, Dad, sister, neighbor, Uncle Lou, Aunt Marsha, their mom's neighbors-son's kid...get the picture? Everyone has a story about cancer, unfortunately. But what people with cancer don't tell you is, that we, respectfully, don't want to hear them. We really don't want to hear about how Uncle Lou died from Melanoma after only battling it for six months or that your mom's neighbors son's kid had cancer and how he fought a hard, excruciating battle from the hospital bed and lost after 8 years. I know that people really mean well, but when you are going through this with no idea of how this is going to turn out, it's so hard to hear those stories. It's very hard. Cancer patients tend to focus on the ugly. We like to hear about how someone with the same battle wins. How they were courageous and won-slapping that cancer bitch in the face (as one of my best friends would say).

 Hearing those stories of innocent people, who were taken by this awful, heartless disease, is too sad for cancer patients. It gives us less hope. We need hope. We need faith. We need everyone's support.

So, next time someone has to share unfortunate news-just hug...just hug and give a little pat. :) That embrace speaks to us too.